Tuesday, December 4, 2007

my argh list

I'm frustrated.

I need to get healthy. My body hurts. I need friends. I need a digital camera. Owen and Melinda gave us one that they had but it doesn't work. It took 2 good pictures when we got it and now it wont work right! ARGH!! I have so many things I want to take pictures of before we move but....anyway.

My body hurts. My teeth need work. My shoulder is hurting, and lately my lower back has been feeling really pinched.
I'm complaining. I'm struggling to stay positive.

Tomorrow is my day off, it will be better.
I'm listening to doo-wop. Makes me really miss singing with Soleigha. Wish she would talk to me. argh again.

All I do is work and sometimes I feel like I'm missing life. I'm too busy to enjoy it. A week will go by and at the end of it I realize I did nothing except work, and maybe watch a movie.

Tomorrow I am going shopping. I have saved up my tips and I really need new church clothes. I will limit myself to a new skirt and a church worthy top. That will make me feel like I have improved my plot. I get so depressed.

It used to be anger. I used to get so mad I would punch things till my knuckles bled. I used to be so angry. Now I get so depressed I withdraw and lay around.

I dont think Adam ever reads this. He would be upset if he knew I was really depressed

Please stop reading this, this is depressing even to read. I'm stopping.


Sunday, December 2, 2007

weeks later....

Wow! has that much time really passed since I last wrote on here! It amazes me how fast the time flies! It doesn't seem like anything has happened since I last wrote but when I stop and think about writing it all I start to get tired. HA! I dont know if it's because I'm lazy or because I have been pretty busy!!
I am sick, or better yet I have been sick for the last week ...or so. It's not really fun. When I am working my hands are constantly wet or in someones wet hair and it seems that as soon as my hands get on soemone's head my nose starts to run. Now this may not seem like a big deal to some of you but I assure it is a huge dilemma. Here is why; in beauty school we are taught that while you are touching someone (doing there hair) you limit the amount of touching yourself (ie; face, hair, skin) as much as possible. There are a few reasons for this. One is that there are skin diseases and disorders that can be passed a long from the client to me. Another is the other way around, I dont want to get them sick, they dont know what I have (not that I have anything) and they can easily blame me for whatever they feel I gave them. Lastly, it is a customer service issue. Once I divert my attention to the itch I have on my arm or in this case dealing with my runny nose, I am not paying attention to the person in my seat therefore I'm not focusing on their haircut. It sounds extreme but I assure you with the amount of hairstylist in this world, it makes a huge difference! Granted there are those faithful clients you've had for a while who are a bit more forgiving than others but.....more often than not, you can be replaced even if they say otherwise. They would rather not have the hassle of finding another hairstylist and "training" them. Back to my nose: This is a SERIOUS issue. In order to stop my runny nose from dripping down my lip (gross, to see and to taste) I have to have a kleenex. You may say 'no big deal. keep a kleenex in your pocket and keep cutting'. Not so simple. Cleanliness is HUGE in this industry and who wants to see someone wipe their nose (even with a kleenex) and then touch them? Not very many people. SO here is what I have to do. I have a bottle of hand sanitizer right next to my station, and everytime I have to wipe or blow my nose in to the kleenex I have to use some hand sanitizer. You can imagine that that combined with my hands being in water all day it is surprising that my hands aren't bleeding as we speak. I believe the only thing saving my hands is conditoner. When I shampoo someones hair I use conditioner and that is why I still have skin on my hands.

Anyways, that was my rant.

We aren't really celebrating Christmas this year. And oddly enough I'm not too tore up about it. Maybe that means I am offiacially grown up. I dont think we will by eachother gifts. Adam will probably will get me something though. He likes to break his own rules. It's sweet because I know he just wants to see me happy but it drives me crazy!!! If he goes with out a gift from me I go without a gift from him. I'm ok with that, and we need to save up for moving.

Ramble ramble. I took a 3 hour nap today when I came home from church and now it's 12:30 at night and I'm not really tired.